Jul 9, 2009

Attaining Heaven

God is known as love
Not-I is certainly love
I must be love too?!

Well, this seems counter-intuitive. It is obvious to me that I am not love; I don't do a lot for other people, don't think that much about other people, don't even pay much attention to other people, unless I want something from them. But logically, Haiku God is love, I am part of Haiku God, so I have to be love too. The only explanation I can think of is that I really am love, but my love is directed inward rather than outward - I love myself first, others after, if at all. Me first. It would follow that the stronger this love of I, the weaker is not-Iness, not-I being outward love. In fact, if we carry it to the extreme of inward love, we become the devil, the ultimate ego.

Conclusion? Simply that if I want to reach heaven (heaven being the state of not-Iness), I must turn my love outward. This will strengthen the not-I in me. And when the not-I is strong enough, heaven will be attained. But there's a conundrum here: logically, I shouldn't want to attain heaven, because it means the elimination of I. There can be no I's in the state of not-Iness. So why should I even try, especially if I like myself so much? Only because I've heard that being not-I is a happier state than being I, and I'd like to experience it, even though by definition I can't. It's a real dilemma for I.
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1 comment:

Phyllis Townley said...

Do you REALLY like yourself that much....or is it simply a dread of NO-THING-NESS (non-being)? If you are capable of loving yourself it would seem that you CAN love others, if you wish. Isn't that what transformation is all about? You don't lose your I.....you become part of Reality without losing your I-ness. At least that's what the mystics say, and who am I to quarrel with THEM?